My Goodbye Letter

There comes to a point in everyone’s life that we all have to take our last breath
See our family for the last time
See that special someone for the last time
Take that last hug and kiss
Take that last exciting moment in our life
Take that last conversation with friends…..
Everyone has to experience they’re last of something…..
When I take my last of everything
I don’t want people to cry
I don’t want people to have a damp in they’re hearts
I don’t want people to think down upon they’re lives
I don’t want people to think less of me as a person as when I was alive
I don’t want all that….
I want to only be remembered….
As a person friends, family, love ones and others have got to known for a long time
I know its going to be sad to see me gone and see how I reflected on some people lives…
I know frowns are going to be on many faces upon those I love and care about the most
But yet I just want people to understand and how this thought in they’re minds and hearts…
I may be gone but I will still be with each and every person that I love and cared about dearly, live in they’re hearts….
All I want from life now is happiness and love
And all I want to when I don’t see another day, is to be remembered and loved
That’s the most I want from everyone in my life today
Remembered and loved
Just love and remember me for all the laughs we shared
All the smiles we had
All the times I may have gotten on your nerves
All the times I was there for you when no one else was
All the times I stayed up just for you
All the times I didn’t bother to listen to you but yet I still did what you told me to do…..
Just remember and love me when I’m gone
Remember the good and the bad….
Remember my mistakes and know I never gave up trying to improve them
Remember my determination
Remember my drive, my passion, my courage, my love, my respect…..
My everything…..
Remember me everyone
Just remember and love me
One day you will see me again and when you do we’ll pick out where we left out
I love and care about you all in my life today
And I’m very blessed to have such great people in my life
I shouldn’t even call this “My Goodbye Letter”
I should really call it “My see you Later Letter”
Cause I will see you later
Whenever God calls your name to come home as well…..
Much love to you and your life
And I will see you later……

Far From Home/No Friends

Far from home just makes me feel left out by my family
And being where I am just makes it feel even worst to be far from them
I know this is my life and career but yet I feel like, “why am I really here“?
What am I really doing here?
I mean I feel like being here is just wasting my time when I could be somewhere I want to be becoming successful
I mean being where I am is good to me but yet I feel like what I’m doing here is just a waste of my time and also my money
Being here just makes me miss my family a lot
Mainly because I don’t want to be where I am right now
I don’t feel comfortable with this type of environment
I mean don’t get me wrong I love the friends I have and also the beautiful women I see everyday
But yet I still cant get over the fact that I’m somewhere I don’t want to be at…..
I know I made a big mistakes coming to a place where I knew from the get go I should not be
Or better yet somewhere I didn’t want to go…..
Most people don’t really fully understand my point when I tell them my reasons why I don’t like it here
I try and explain to some but yet its like people wont really fully understand my story behind me being here….
But the most important people in my life really don’t get my point in why I don’t want to be here
Its like they hardly care about how I feel towards my life right now
I mean I still and always will love, care and respect them
That’s never going to change
But yet for them to not understand me right now in my life, really hurts a spot in my heart….
Being far away from them isn’t so much easy as people want to put it
Its kind of hard for me to be far from home with no one hardly to talk to or associate with
I have so little amount of friends I can pretty much name them on one hand
That’s how low it is….
But basically beside those few, I have no friends….
Coming here I had somewhat of a bunch of friends, but when me and those friends got here
They seem to forget who I was….
Though it is sad, I basically am use to people being friends at first to me but then some point later they’re gone and I’ll never see or talk to them again……
I care when I lose friends but nevertheless I still have a careless feeling that goes on inside of me
So I just let it go and let it be it is what it is…..
I don’t beg for people to associate with me
Because I’m going to do me and make it into life whether I have friends or not….
I am glad of the few friends I have but deep down besides having no friends I’m also missing someone special that I can really talk to and get somewhat close to
I am mentally, emotionally and physically ready for a relationship but yet I am patient
Because I don’t want to rush so I’m going to wait till I spot that very special one
I am a little bitter on waiting but its for the best though…..
Being far away from home and having no friends has put a some damp into my heart
Because without those things motivating me, its hard to concentrate on my life and what I’m doing
Though its hard to be away from home with no friends
I will try and keep my head up and think positive
I wish I had something to spark my life right now
But the only thing that can spark my life now is my book and also you

In And Out

What you see is my outside....
My appearance.....
What I can do....
What I can be.....
But what you don’t see is my inside....
You cant see what’s inside of me.....
What’s inside of me matters the most
Whether relationships, friendship, family, lover, etc.....
The outside just tells a fantasy....
But my inside tells a story.....
My inside is what makes me whole and who I am....
The heart, the mind, the soul
Gives me, passion, integrity, strength, power, knowledge, loyalty, respect......
Love......
You cant tell If I have all that just by looking on the outside....
You have to get to know me from that inside and out....
If you just stay on the outside
All you getting is now.....
If you get on the inside....
You get a future and a forever......
Inside last longer then just what you see on the outside.....
Outside is your attention...
But the Inside is your innovation......

Going Home

One day, I will have seen all the things that i needed to see
One day, I will eat all the things that I needed to eat
One day, I will have learned everything that I needed to know
One day, I will stop breathing.......
Don’t know when, but it can happen anytime and anywhere.....
Once I take that last breath
That last heart beat.....
That last touch from a love one.....
That last kiss......
I’m gone......
Friends left behind.....
Family left crying, wishing I never left......
Its too soon for him to go, your friends and family would say.....
But there shouldn’t be any tears, no sorrows no complaints......
I’m gone physically......but I'm always here in spirit.....
It was just my time to go home.....
God called me in.....
So I cant fight it, I must go home......
So hold on to your tears.......I will see you when you come home.....
I will surely miss you, but.......
I will see you soon.......
Going home is a new life and a new start
So I'll be going home one day....
But for now Ima live everyday as its my last......